Percussionist Jokes
How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They have a machine to do it for them.
Why are orchestra intermissions limited to 20 minutes?
So you don't have to retrain the drummers.
What do you call someone who hangs out with musicians?
A drummer.
What did the drummer get on his IQ test?
Drool.
How do you know when a drummer is knocking at your door?
The knock always slows down.
How do you get a drummer to play an accelerando?
Ask him to play in 4/4 at a steady 120 bpm.
Why do bands have bass players?
To translate for the drummer.
How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?
One, but he'll break 5 of them before he figures out you can't just push them in.
Why do drummers have a half-ounce more brains than horses?
So they don't disgrace themselves in the parade.
If thine enemy wrong thee, buy each of his children a drum.
Heard backstage: ``Will the musicians and the drummer please come to the stage!''