Musician Jokes
What do you call a musician without a significant other?
Homeless.
There were two people walking down the street. One was a musician. The other didn't have any money either.
What's the first thing a musician says at work?
``Would you like fries with that?''
Saint Peter is checking ID's at the Pearly Gates, and first comes a Texan. ``Tell me, what have you done in life?'' says St. Peter.
The Texan says, ``Well, I struck oil, so I became rich, but I didn't sit on my laurels--I divided all my money among my entire family in my will, so our descendants are all set for about three generations.''
St. Peter says, ``That's quite something. Come on in. Next!''
The second guy in line has been listening, so he says, ``I struck it big in the stock market, but I didn't selfishly just provide for my own like that Texan guy. I donated five million to Save the Children.''
``Wonderful!'' says Saint Peter. ``Come in. Who's next?''
The third guy has been listening, and says timidly with a downcast look, ``Well, I only made five thousand dollars in my entire lifetime.''
``Heavens!'' says St. Peter. ``What instrument did you play?''
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St. Peter's still checking ID's. He asks a man, ``What did you do on Earth?''
The man says, ``I was a doctor.''
St. Peter says, ``Ok, go right through those pearly gates. Next! What did you do on Earth?''
``I was a school teacher.''
``Go right through those pearly gates. Next! And what did you do on Earth?''
``I was a musician.''
``Go around the side, up the freight elevator, through the kitchen...''