Sardar Jokes

[sanilss]

sandwiches

Two Sardars went into a pub and after ordering two
drinks took some sandwiches out of their pockets and started to eat them.
"You can't eat your own sandwiches in here," complained the pub-owner.
So the two sardars exchanged their sandwiches.
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[rameshxavier]

There was this news that 200 sardars are killed in a train accident at the station. Only one Sardar left alive.

The correspondent goes to the Sardarji and the conversation between them goes as follows: Correspondent: How did this happen?


Sardarji: Well, all the 200 people were waiting for the train. They were standing on the platform. Then there was this announcement that the train is arriving on platform number 2. They got scared to know that the train is arriving on the platform and hence they jumped onto the tracks to save themselves, The announcement was misleading the train arrived on the track and you can see the result.

Correspondent: Well, I guess, you must be the intelligent Sardarji. Why did you not jump onto the tracks?

Sardarji: I was actually trying to commit suicide. I was waiting for the train on the tracks. When I heard that the train is arriving on the platform, I climbed up.

[rameshxavier]

1. Sardar ji is buying a TV
"Do you have color TVs?"
"Sure."
"Give me a green one, please."

2- Sardar Ji calls Air India.
"How long does it take to fly to Amritsar?"
"Just a sec," says the rep.
Thank you." says the Sardar ji and hangs up.

3- Sardar ji is filling up a job application
He promptly fills in the lines on NAME, AGE, ADDRESS, etc.
Then came the column SALARY EXPECTED
After much thought he writes: Yes

[sanilss]

Sardarji went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain.
"I would like to buy this small TV," he told the salesman.
"Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," he replied.
He hurried home removed his turban and changed his hair style, and returned
to tell the salesman
"I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," Salesman replied.
"Damn, he recognised me," he thought.
He went for a complete disguise this time, haircut, new hair colour,
new outfit, big sunglasses, waited a few days, saw the salesman again.
"I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to Sardars," he replied.
Frustrated, he exclaimed, "How do you know I'm a Sardar?"
"Because that's a microwave," he replied.

[grace55]

Sardarjee to Sunita: "I want to marry you"
Sunita: "But I am one year elder to you."
Sardarjee: "No Problem, then I will marry you next year."

Q Why does sardarji brings binoculorses in his own marriage?
A To see his far reletavies.

A Sardar went to interview for a job in military…when he got to the Officer
Officer told him that new rules were in effect to check the education of candidates.
In order to get job 1must answer two questions:
1. Name two days of the week that begin with "T".
2. How many seconds are there in a year?

The Sardar thought for a few minutes and answered...
1. The two days of the week that begin with "T" are Today and Tomorrow.
2. There are 24 seconds in a year.

Officer said, "OK, Its okay the “Today and Tomorrow”, so your answer is correct.

But how did you get only 24 seconds in a year?"
The Sardar replied, "Well, January 2nd & 22nd, February 2nd & 22nd, March 2nd & 22nd, etc...."

[grace55]

Teacher to Sardar: Write your best friend’s name in English.
Sardar wrote: ‘Beautiful Red Underware’
Teacher: What?
Sardar: His name is Sundar Lal Chaddi.

When sardar was traveling with his wife in an auto, the driver
adjusted mirror. Sardar shouted, “You are trying to see my wife?
Sit back. I will drive.”

[grace55]

Judge: Order! Order!
Sardar: Ek full chicken masala, 4 paratha, 1 kabab aur 1 coffee.
Judge: Shut up!
Sardar: Shut up nahi 7 up.

[sanilss]

Three men were applying for the same job as a detective. One was a Sardarji, one was Jewish, and one was Italian. The chief decided to ask each applicant just one question and base his decision upon that answer. When the Jewish man arrived for his interview, the chief asked him, "Who killed Jesus Christ?" The Jewish man answered without hesitation. "The Romans killed him." The chief thanked him and he left. When the Italian man arrived for his interview, the chief asked the Same question. He replied "Jesus was killed by the Jews." Again, the chief thanked the man who then left. Finally the Sardarji arrived for his interview, he was asked the same question. He thought for a long time, before saying,"Could I have some time to think about it?" The chief said,"OK, but get back to me tomorrow." When the Sardarji arrived home, his wife asked "How was the interview ?". Sardarji replied, "Great, I got the job, and I'm already investigating a murder.

[sanilss]

Santa Banta on Double Decker Bus



Santa Singh and Banta Singh landed up in Bombay. They managed to get into a double- decker bus. Santa Singh somehow managed to get a bottom seat, But unfortunate Banta got pushed to the top. After a while when the rush is over, Santa went upstairs to see friend Bannta Singh.
He met Banta in a bad condition clutching the seats in front with both hands, scared to death. He says, "Are Banta Singh!
What the heck's going' on? Why are you scared ? I was enjoying my ride down there ?" Scared Banta replies. "Yeah, but you've got a *driver.* "

[grace55]

Sardarji visits his Chinese friend dying in hospital.
Man says CHIN YU YAN n dies.
Sardar ji goes 2 China 2 find meaning of his friends
last words.
It is `U R STANDNG ON my Oxygen TUBE!”

Teacher : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing,
one is green and one is blue with red spots!Sardar ji: Yes it’s really strange.
I’ve got another pair of the same at home.

SARDAR : I HAV’NT SLEPT ALL NITE IN THE TRAIN.
FRIEND : WHY
SARDAR : GOT UPPER BERTH
FRIEND : WHY DIDN’T YOU EXCHANGED
SARDAR : OYE, THERE WAS NOBODY TO EXCHANGE IN THE LOWER BERTH.