Fishing****

[Transport]

Some fishing terms
Ten common fishing terms explained

Catch and Release - A conservation motion that happens most often right before the local Fish and Game officer pulls over a boat that has caught over it's limit.

Hook - (1) A curved piece of metal used to catch fish. (2) A clever advertisement to entice a fisherman to spend his live savings on a new rod and reel. (3) The punch administered by said fisherman's wife after he spends their life savings (see also, Right Hook, Left Hook).

Line - Something you give your co-workers when they ask on Monday how your fishing went the past weekend.

Lure - An object that is semi-enticing to fish, but will drive an angler into such a frenzy that he will charge his credit card to the limit before exiting the tackle shop.

Reel - A weighted object that causes a rod to sink quickly when dropped overboard.

Rod - An attractively painted length of fiberglass that keeps an angler from ever getting too close to a fish.

School - A grouping in which fish are taught to avoid your $29.99 lures and hold out for spam instead.

Tackle - What your last catch did to you as you reeled him in, but just before he wrestled free and jumped back overboard.

Tackle Box - A box shaped alarmingly like your comprehensive first aid kit. Only a tackle box contains many sharp objects, so that when you reach in the wrong box blindly to get a Band Aid, you soon find that you need more than one.

Test - (1) The amount of strength a fishing line affords an angler when fighting fish in a specific weight range. (2) A measure of your creativity in blaming "that darn line" for once again losing the fish.

[Transport]

Fishermen meet
When Fishermen Meet

"Hiyamac"

"Lobuddy"

"Binearlong?"

"Coplours"

"Cetchenny?"

"Goddafew"

"Kindarthay?"

"Bassencarp"

"Ennysizetoom?"

"Couplapowns"

"Hittinhard?"

"Sordalike"

"Wachoosen?"

"Gobbawurms"

"Fishanonaboddum?"

"Rydononaboddum"

"Whatchadrinkin?"

"Jugajimbeam"

"Igoddago"

"Tubad"

"Seeyaroun"

"Yeahtakideezy"

"Guluck"

[Transport]

Catching the fish
Jim had an awful day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day without catching a single one. On his way home, he stopped at the supermarket and ordered four catfish. He told the fish salesman, "Pick four large ones out and throw them at me, will you?"

"Why do you want me to throw them at you?"

"Because I want to tell my wife that I caught them."

"Okay, but I suggest that you take the orange roughy."

"But why?"

"Because your wife came in earlier today and said that if you came by, I should tell you to take orange roughy. She prefers that for supper tonight."

[tuluvaguy]

good collections
All jokes are accelerating others

[koulstuff]

hahaha... funny...