Writers Funny Quote

"The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense."
Tom Clancy

"I never know what I think about something until I read what I've written on it."
William Faulkner

"I handed in a script last year and the studio didn't change one word. The word they didn't change was on page 87."
Steve Martin

"I have always been a huge admirer of my own work. I'm one of the funniest and most entertaining writers I know."
Mel Brooks

"It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous."
Robert Benchley

"A writer is congenitally unable to tell the truth and that is why we call what he writes fiction."
William Faulkner

"The free-lance writer is the person who is paid per piece or per word or perhaps."
Robert Benchley

"Why did God create men? Because vibrators can't mow the lawn."
Madonna

"All men are not homeless, but some men are home less than others."
Henry Youngman

"To attract men, I wear a perfume called 'New Car Interior'."
Rita Rudner

"This guy says, 'I'm perfect for you, because I'm a cross between a macho and a sensitive man.'
I said, 'Oh, a gay trucker?'"
Judy Tenuta

"Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speech by something outside himself -- like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks."
Jean Kerr

"Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we've always had: work or prison."
Tim Allen

I like funny tips and quatations. Thanks