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What did the hotel manager say to the elephant that couldn't pay his bill?
"Pack your trunk and clear out!"
How do you get an elephant into a matchbox?
Take all the matches out first!
What weighs 4 tons and is bright red?
An elephant holding its breath!
What' s grey, has four legs and jumps up and down?
An elephant on a trampoline!
What's grey and wrinkly and jumps every twenty seconds?
An elephant with hiccups!
What's grey and goes round and round?
An elephant in a washing machine!
What's grey and highly dangerous?
An elephant with a machine gun!
What's big and grey and lives in a lake in Scotland?
The Loch Ness Elephant!
What's big and grey and has 16 wheels?
An elephant on roller skates!
What goes up slowly and comes down quickly?
An elephant in a lift!
What's as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?
An elephant's shadow!
What grey, has a wand, huge wings and gives money to elephants?
The tusk fairy!
What has 3 tails, 4 trunks and 6 feet?
An elephant with spare parts!
What's grey but turns red?
An embarrassed elephant!
What's grey, beautiful and wears glass slippers?
Cinderelephant!
When should you feed milk to a baby elephant?
When it's a baby elephant!
How do you know when there is an elephant under your bed?
When your nose touches the ceiling!
hey you got a lot of jukes
hhhhhhhhaaahahahaahaa
whats next man :D
thnx man.. im receiving a first appreciation...Quote:
Originally Posted by tiranafashion
Farm Jokes
Why did the bull rush?
Because it saw the cow slip!
What kind of bird lays electric eggs?
A battery hen!
What do you call an arctic cow?
An eskimoo!
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick-layer!
How do you fit more pigs on your farm?
Build a sty-scraper!
Why does a rooster watch TV?
For hentertainment!
What do you get from a drunk chicken?
Scotch eggs!
What do you call a crate of ducks?
A box of quackers!
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a bell?
A bird that has to wring its own neck!
What do you get if you all sit under a cow?
A pat on the head!
What's the best way to make a bull sweat?
Put him in a tight jumper!
What do you call a pig that took a plane?
Swine flu!