a good joke

[peloko]

A man recovers the knowledge in a hospital after an accident of car. They have done a long operation to him and when he recovers the conscience he meets the doctor examining him. - Gentleman, I have to give you two news: the good and different bad one. Which does want first?
- Say to me first the bad one.
- We had to cut your legs to be able to save you.
- Oh, shit! And the good one?
- That now you will be able to presume from that the cock comes to him up to the floor.

[ftvfatboy]

Employee Resignation


Poetic Resignation


The name is good, the brand is big

But the work I do is that of a pig

The work or the brand; what is my way?

I don't know if I should stay.



To work, they have set their own way

Nobody will care to hear what I say

My will be NULL, they wont change their way

I don't know if I should stay.



The project is in a critical stage

But to do good work, this is the age

This dilemma is killing me day by day

I don't know if I should stay.



The money is good, the place is great

But the development is at a very small rate

Should I go for the work, or wait for pay

I don't know if I should stay!



The managers don't know what they talk

The team doesn't know where they walk

That's a bad situation, what say?

I don't know if I should stay.



I can go to any other place

But what if I get the same disgrace

I can't keep switching day by day

I don't know if I should stay.



The -ves are more, the +ves are less

Then why have this unnecessary mess

No more will I walk their way,

It's all done, I won't stay.



Thanks & Regards

Employee

[ftvfatboy]

Krishna:
Arjun, Try to respect the e-mails of your colleagues.

Arjun:
But Vasudev, how dare I send junk mails to my honourable elders, who are
logged on to honourable domains ?

Krishna :
Paarth, at this moment they neither are your friend nor your foes. They are
mere mail-users. So follow your Net-dharma. Logon and send dozens of
junk mails. This is your Karma and this alone is your Dharma.


Arjun:
Murari ! After seeing all this, I feel like resigning from the company
itself.


Krishna:
Bandhu, it seems you are caught in a vicious circle of Maaya. In this
material world you have none and you are commited to none. Junk mails have
existed before you came to this world and shall remain long after you are
gone. Rise above this Maaya and perform your duty. Just keep sending junk
mails.


Arjun:
But Devaki Nandan...........!

Krishna :
....Victory or failure is not in your hands. So stop pondering about
results. Don't waste your knowledge on the junk shastra bestowed by your
Guru.


Arjun:
Hey Keshav, how is junk mail related to the 'system'?

Krishna:
Junk mail is just junk mail. It has no connection with Hardware. However, it
is another matter that it overloads the system... fills up the hard
disk....but you are not supposed to worry about it. Listen Kunti putra, the
way Aatma leaves one physical body and moves onto another, likewise these
junk mails move from system to system.


Arjun:
How can one define junk mail?

Krishna :
Neither fire can burn it.., nor air can dry it... neither it can be
conquered nor it can be defeated. He who sends junk mails cannot be looked
down upon even by Mahadev... Junk mails are immortal.


Arjun:
Hey Narayan! Now all my doubts on junk mail are crystal clear. You have
opened my eyes Yashoda Nandan, or else I would have lost Myself in Maaya and
read all the junk mails myself.


............ MAHAAABHAAAAARAT .............

Years have passed since then, generations have come and gone, seasons have
cycled, technology advanced, but junk mails remain. So, go on, contribute
something to the history by hitting that forward button yet again to send
this junk mail to all !!!!!

[ftvfatboy]

Life before marriage is AIRTEL
" u can express ur self ".



During honeymoon is RELIANCE-
" Always get in Touch ".



After Honeymoon is HUTCH
" Wherever u go ur network follows".



After one year Life is IDEA
" A mistake can change ur life ".



After 10 years Life is BSNL
" Subscriber is not reachable "?????????

[ftvfatboy]

Guy gets on a plane and finds himself seated next to an attractive brunette. He immediately turns to her and makes his move; "I've heard that flights pass quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger, so let's talk"

The brunette who had just opened her book, closes it and says; "What would you like to discuss?"

"Oh I don't know," says the guy "how about nuclear power?"

"Well that could be interesting, but first let me ask you a question. Horses, cows and deer all eat grass. Yet the deer excretes small pellets, the horse muffin sized chunks and the cow big squishy pancakes. How come?"

Dumbfounded the man replies; "I have absolutely no idea"

"I see" says the brunette, "So you feel qualified to talk about nuclear power, but clearly you don't know shit!!"

[mmal]

Haha, I actually had to read that last joke twice to make sure I understood it. :oops: That's what happens when you read message boards at 2 in the morning, I suspect.

[hoktubha]

hahaha it is fun


I actually had to read that last joke twice to make sure I understood it. That's what happens when you read message boards at 2 in the morning, I suspect.

[ftvfatboy]

An older man goes in for his yearly physical examination, with his wife
tagging along.
When the doctor enters the examination room he says, "I will need a urine
sample, a stool sample, and a sperm sample."
The old man, being hard of hearing, turns to his wife and asks, "What did
he say?"
The wife yells back to him, "GIVE HIM YOUR UNDERWEAR!"

[ftvfatboy]

It's a fine sunny day in the forest and a rabbit is
sitting outside his
burrow, tippy-tapping on his typewriter. Along comes a
fox, out for a
walk.

Fox: "What are you working on?"
Rabbit: "My thesis."

Fox: "Hmm... What is it about?"
Rabbit: "Oh, I'm writing about how rabbits eat foxes."

Fox: "That's ridiculous! Any fool knows that rabbits
don't eat foxes!"
Rabbit: "Come with me and I'll show you!"

They both disappear into the rabbit's burrow. After
few minutes,
gnawing

on a fox bone, the rabbit returns to his typewriter
and resumes typing.

Soon a wolf comes along and stops to watch the
hardworking rabbit.

Wolf: "What's that you are writing?" Rabbit: "I'm
doing a thesis on how
rabbits eat wolves."

Wolf: "you don't expect to get such rubbish published,
do you?"

Rabbit: "No problem. Do you want to see why?"

The rabbit and the wolf go into the burrow and again
the rabbit returns
by himself, after a few minutes, and goes back to
typing.

Finally a bear comes along and asks, "What are you
doing?

Rabbit: "I'm doing a thesis on how rabbits eat bears."

Bear: "Well that's absurd! "

Rabbit: "Come into my home and I'll show you"

Scene: As they enter the! Burrow, the rabbit
introduces the bear to the
lion.

[ftvfatboy]

[1] Infertility unlikely to be passed on - Montgomery Advertiser

[2] Study Finds Sex, Pregnancy Link - Cornell Daily Sun

[3] Survey Finds Dirtier Subways After Cleaning Jobs Were Cut - The New
York Times

[4] Larger Kangaroos Leap Farther, Researchers Find - The Los Angeles
Times

[5] Light' meals are lower in fat, calories - Huntington Herald-Dispatch

[6] Alcohol ads promote drinking - The Hartford Courant

[7] Malls try to attract shoppers - The Baltimore Sun

[8] Official: Only rain will cure drought - The Herald-News, Westpost,
Massachusetts

[9] Teen-age girls often have babies fathered by men - The Sunday
Oregonian

[10] Low Wages Said Key to Poverty - Newsday

[11] Man shoots neighbor with machete - The Miami Herald

[12] Economist uses theory to explain economy - Collinsville
Herald-Journal

[13] Bible church's focus is the Bible --- Saint Augustine Record,
Florida

[14] Court Rules Boxer Shorts Are Indeed Underwear --- Journal of
Commerce

[15] Lack of brains hinders research --- The Columbus Dispatch