Jokes about cats

[fortetfn]

A lot more about cats!!


You never feed me.
Perhaps I'll sleep on your face.
That will show you.

I need a new toy.
Tail of black dog keeps good time.
Pounce! good dog! good dog!

The rule for today:
Touch my tail, I shred your hand.
New rule tomorrow.

[fortetfn]

In deep sleep hear sound
Cat throw up hairball somewhere
Will find in morning

Grace personified,
I leap into the window.
I meant to do that.

[fortetfn]

Blur of motion, then --
Silence, me, a paper bag.
What is so funny?

You're always typing.
Well, let's see you ignore my
Sitting on your hands.

[fortetfn]

My small cardboard box.
You cannot see me if I
Can hide my head.

Terrible battle.
I fought for hours. Come and see!
What's a 'term paper'?

[fortetfn]

Small brave carnivores
Kill pine cones and mosquitoes
Fear vacuum cleaner.

Want to trim my claws?
Don't even think about it!
My cries will wake the dead.

[fortetfn]

I want to be close
To you. Can I fit my head
inside your armpit?

Wanna go outside.
Oh, no! Help! I got outside!
Let me back inside!

[fortetfn]

Oh no! Big One
has been trapped by newspaper!
Cat to the rescue!

Humans are so strange.
Mine lies still in bed, then screams!
My claws aren't that sharp . . .

[fortetfn]

Litter box not here
You must have moved it again
I'll crap in the sink.

We're almost equals
I purr to show I love you
Want to smell my butt?

[CalumHunter]

that is sad, cats are part of nature

[fortetfn]

Why would you say that it is sad... these are jokes about cats...
It is supposed to be funny.