Crazy jokes

**sherlyk** · 12-29-2009, 10:14 AM

Four Catholic Women

Four Catholic women were having coffee.

The first Catholic woman tells her friends, "My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'".

The second Catholic woman chirps, "My son is a bishop. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Grace'".

The third Catholic lady says, "My son is a cardinal. When he enters a room everyone says 'Your Eminence'".

Since the fourth Catholic woman sips her coffee in silence, the first three women give her this subtle "Well...?"

So she replies, "My son is a gorgeous, 6' 2 " hard-bodied stripper. When he walks into a room, people say, 'Oh, my God....' ".

__________________

**sherlyk** · 12-29-2009, 10:21 AM

You are Damn American

A crazy Desi was running amuck in central business area of Banglore.

He saw one American guy. He approached him and said, "You are Japanese."

The American said, "No, I am American."

Crazy Desi goes again raising his voice, "No you are Japanese."

The polite American said, "No, No, I am American sir"

Crazy Desi says in yelling voice, "You are Japanese."

The scared American replies in conformance, "Yes, I am Japanese."

The Cooled down Desi goes, "Perhaps, but you look like damn American OK."

**ppancakke** · 01-21-2010, 09:56 PM

You passion a pancake?I searched as is more tasty them to prepare.Has develop a portion of interesting here pancake recipe

**sanjicica** · 02-08-2010, 06:23 PM

Idu dvije kamile vozom i jedan pogleda na prozor.

**sanjicica** · 02-08-2010, 06:24 PM

good one, good :)

**sherlyk** · 02-11-2010, 09:59 AM

A married couple is driving down the interstate doing 55 mph. The husband is behind the wheel. His wife looks over at him and says, "Honey, I know we've been married for 15 years, but, I want a divorce."

The husband says nothing but slowly increases speed to 60 mph.

She then says, "I don't want you to try to talk me out of it, because I've been having an affair with your best friend, and he's a better lover than you."

Again the husband stays quiet and just speeds up as he clenches his hands on the wheels.

She says, "I want the house." Again the husband speeds up, and now is doing 70 mph.

She says, "I want the kids too." The husband just keeps driving faster, and faster, until he's up to 80 mph.

She says, "I want the car, the checking account, and all the credit cards too." The husband slowly starts to veer toward a bridge overpass piling, as she says, "Is there anything you want?"

The husband says, "No, I've got everything I need right here."

She asks, "What's that?"

The husband replies just before they hit the wall at 90 mph, "I've got the airbag!"

**sherlyk** · 03-04-2010, 03:35 PM

Pay Attention
First-year students at a Medical School were receiving their first anatomy class with a real dead human body. They all gathered around the surgery table with the body covered with a white sheet.

The professor started the class by telling them, "In medicine, it is necessary to have 2 important qualities as a doctor. The first is that you are not disgusted by anything involving the human body." For an example, the professor pulled back the sheet, stuck his finger in the butt of the corpse, withdrew it and stuck it in his mouth. "Go ahead and do the same thing," he told his students.

The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes, but eventually took turns sticking a finger in the butt of the dead body and sucking on it.

When everyone finished, the Professor looked at them calmly and told them, "The second most important quality is observation. I stuck in my middle finger and sucked on my index finger. Now learn to pay attention...."

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**sherlyk** · 03-11-2010, 03:38 PM

Haircut

There is this good ol' barber in some city in the US. One day a florist goes to him for a haircut. After the cut, he goes to pay the barber and the barber replies: "I am sorry, I cannot accept money from you; I am doing a community service." The florist is happy and leaves the shop. The next morning when the barber goes to open his shop, there is a thank you card and a dozen roses waiting at his door.

A cop goes for a haircut and he also goes to pay the barber and the barber replies: "I am sorry, I cannot accept money from you; I am doing a community service." The cop is happy and leaves the shop. The next morning when the barber goes to open his shop, there is a thank you card and a dozen donuts waiting at his door.

An Asian software engineer goes for a haircut and he also goes to pay the barber and barber replies; "I am sorry, I cannot accept money from you; I am doing a community service." The next morning when the barber goes to open his shop, guess what he finds there - a dozen Asians waiting for a free haircut...

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**sherlyk** · 03-20-2010, 10:50 AM

Jail

A white guy, a Chinese guy, and a Hispanic guy are breaking out of jail. They get all the way to the top of a hill, and at the bottom there is a barbed wired fence. The white guy says, 'O.k. whatever happens when you hit the ground DON'T SCREAM!'

The white guy goes first, he breaks a leg, doesn't scream.

The Chinese guy goes he breaks a arm, doesn't scream.

Then the Hispanic guy goes, and screams his head off! The other two ask him why he screamed so he points at the fence and says, 'Looky, looky, balls on hooky.'

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