Q: What if you don't want to wait fifty years?
A: Parachute him from an airplane.



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Q: Why isn't it safe to climb oak trees between 2 and 4 in the afternoon?
A: Because that is when the elephants practice their parachute jumping.



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Q: What is a furry alligator?
A: A bear that went into the woods at 3 o'clock.



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Q: Why do ducks have flat feet?
A: From stamping out forest fires.



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Q: Why do elephants have flat feet?
A: From stamping out flaming ducks.



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Q: Why are elephants feet shaped that way?
A: To fit on lily pads.



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Q: Why isn't it safe to go onto the lily pads between 4 and 6 in the afternoon?
A: That's when the elephants are walking on the lily pads.



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Q: Why are frogs so short?
A: They go onto the lily pads between 4 and 6 in the afternoon.



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Q: What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?
A: 5 O'clock (trick question - not "Time to get a new fence..")



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Q: Why do elephants paint the soles of their feet yellow?
A: So that they can hide upside-down in bowls of custard.



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Q: Did you ever find an elephant in your custard?
A: No? Well, it must work.