Animal Jokes....... {CLEAN}

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What's gray, squeaky and hangs around in caves?
Stalagmice!

What mouse was a Roman emperor?
Julius Cheeser!

Who is king of all the mice?
Mouse Tse Tung!

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What do angry rodents send each other at Christmas time?
Cross mouse cards!

What's the hardest part of milking a mouse?
Getting it to fit over a bucket!

Hickory hickory dock.
The mouse ran up the clock
The clock struck one
But the rest got away with minor injuries

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What do you call a mouse that can pick up an elephant?
Sir!

What do mice do when they're at home?
Mousework!

What have 12 legs, six eyes, three tails and can't see?
Three blind mice!

What is small, furry and smells like bacon?
A hamster!

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When should a mouse carry an umbrella?
When it's raining cats and dogs!

What's the definition of a narrow squeak?
A thin mouse!

Is there a mouse in the house?
No, but there's a moose on the loose!

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What is small, has a long tail and works with the police?
A gerbil shepherd dog!

What is gray, hairy and lives on a mans face?
A mouse-tache!

Why did the mouse eat a candle?
For some light refreshment!

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What goes dot, dot, dash, squeak?
Mouse code!

What do you get if cross a mouse woth a packet of washing up powder?
Bubble and squeak!

What's a mouse's favorite record?
Please cheese me!

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What's gray and furry on the inside and white on the outside?
A mouse sandwich!

What do you call a mouse who can pick up a horse?
Sir!

How do mice celebrate when they move home?
With a mouse warming party!

Who has large antlers, a high voice and wears white gloves?
Mickey Moose!

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How do you save a drowning mouse?
Use mouse to mouse resuscitation!

Where do hamsters come from?
Hamsterdam!

What's a mouse's least favorite record?
What's up Pussycat!

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Why do mice need oiling?
Because they squeak!

What do rodents say when they play bingo?
'Eyes down for a full mouse'!

What does a twelve-pound mouse say to a cat?
'Here Kitty, kitty, kitty'!

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What kind of musical instrument do mice play?
A mouse organ!

Why do mice have long tails?
Well, they'd look silly with long hair!

What did the mouse say when his friend broke his front teeth?
Hard cheese!

What is a mouse's favorite game?
Hide and squeak!