Just 4 lafs : INDIAN

[kiransmiles]

Vajpayee, Musharraf, Madhuri Dixit and Margaret Thatcher are traveling in a train. The train suddenly goes through a tunnel and it gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a slap! The train comes out of the tunnel. Thatcher and Vajpayee are sitting there looking perplexed. Musharraf is bent over holding his face, which is red from an apparent slap. All of them remain diplomatic and nobody says anything.

Thatcher is thinking: "These Pakistanis are all crazy after Madhuri. Musharraf must have tried to kiss her in the tunnel. Very proper that she slapped him"

Madhuri is thinking: "Musharraf must have moved to kiss me, and kissed Margaret instead and got slapped."

Musharraf is thinking: "Damn! it, Vajpayee must have tried to kiss Madhuri, she thought it was me and slapped! me."

Vajpayee is thinking: "If this train goes through another tunnel, I could make another kissing sound and slap Musharraf again

[kiransmiles]

A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She
gestures alluringly to the barman who comes over immediately. When he
arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face close to
hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his beard, which is full
and bushy.

"Are you the landlord?" she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands.

"Actually, no," he replies.

"Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him," she asks, running her
hands up beyond his beard and into his hair.

"I'm afraid I can't," breathes the barman, clearly aroused. "Is there
anything I can do?"

"Yes there is. I need you to give him a message," she continues huskily,
popping a couple of fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them
gently.

"Tell him that there is no toilet paper in the ladies room, but nevermind i dont need coz i have used my fingers"

[kiransmiles]

A 90-year-old man went for his annual check-up and the doctor said,
"Friend, for your age you're in the best shape I've seen."

The old feller replied, "Yep. It comes from clean living. Why I know I live
a good, clean, spiritual life."

The doctor asked, "What makes you say that?"

The old man replied, "If I didn't live a good, clean life the Lord wouldn't
turn the bathroom light on for me every time I get up in the middle of the
night."

The doctor was concerned. "You mean when you get up in the night to go to
the bathroom, the Lord Himself turns on the light for you?"

"Yep," the old man said, "Whenever I get up to go to the bathroom, the Lord
turns the light on for me."

The doctor didn't say anything else, but when the old man's wife came in
for her check-up, he felt he had to let her know what her husband said. "I
just want you to know," the doctor said, "Your husband's in fine physical
shape, but I'm concerned about his mental condition. He told me that every
night when he gets up to go to the bathroom, the Lord turns the light on
for him."

"He what?" she cried.

"He said every night when he gets up to go to the bathroom, the Lord turns
the light on for him."

"Aha!" she exclaimed. "So he's the one who's been peeing in the refrigerator!"

[kiransmiles]

First guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive.

_____________________________________

Wife Wanted
A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted."
The next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same: "You can have mine

[kiransmiles]

Man says to God: 'God, why did you make woman so

beautiful?

God says: 'So you would love her.'

'But God, 'the man says, 'Why did you make her so dumb?'

God says: 'So she would love you.'