(A+) t o d a y 's j o k e

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

I went to my doctor and told him "my penis is burning."

He said, "That means somebody is talking about it." (Garry Shandling)

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

A guy shows up late for work.

The boss yells "You should have been here at 8:30!"

he replies: "Why? What happened at 8:30?"

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

I feel sorry for people who don’t drink or do drugs. Because someday they’re going to be in a hospital bed, dying, and they won’t know why.

(Redd Foxx)

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

My wife and I took out life insurance policies on each other -- so now it's just a waiting game.

(Bill Dwyer)

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

Bob: "Emily, aren’t you afraid of death?"

Emily: "I just think of it as a part of life."

Bob: "Yeah. The last part."

(Bob Newhart show/Sy Rosen)

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

Three guys, stranded on a desert island, find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish.

The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home.

The second guy wishes the same.

The third guy says "I’m lonely. I wish my friends were back here."

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch.

He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.

Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail.

The snail says ‘What the hell was that all about?"

[indianbaba]

Nice jokes.
All unread ones.
Thanks for sharing neeraj.

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

Its my great pleasure to find you frequently visiting this thread indianbaba and encouraging everybody.

Here is one more.

A mechanic was removing the cylinder heads from the motor of a car when he spotted the famous heart surgeon in his shop, who was standing off to the side, waiting for the service manager to come to take a look at his car.

The mechanic shouted across the garage,"Hello Doctor! Please
come over here for a minute." The famous surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic.

The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked argumentatively, "So doctor, look at this. I also open
hearts, take valves out, grind 'em, put in new parts, and when I finish this will work as a new one. So how come you get the big money, when you and me is doing basically the same work? "

The doctor leaned over and whispered to the mechanic .....

"TRY TO DO IT WHEN THE ENGINE IS RUNNING."

[Guttu]

gr8 joke
And its true also
Its difficult for docors to work on beating heart