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Good One Dear... Keep Sharing :-) :D
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A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."
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A little girl asked her Mom, "Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?"
Mom replies, "No, because she is in heat."
"What's that mean?" asked the child.
"Go ask your father. I think he's in the garage."
The little girl goes to the garage and says, "Dad, may I take Belle for a walk around the block? I asked Mom, but she said the dog was in heat, and to come to you."
Dad said, "Bring Belle over here."
He took a rag, soaked it with gasoline, and scrubbed the dog's backside with it and said, "Okay, you can go now, but keep Belle on the leash and only go one time around the block."
The little girl left, and returned a few minutes later with no dog on the leash.
Surprised, Dad asked, "Where's Belle?"
The little girl said, "She ran out of gas about halfway down the block, so another dog is pushing her home."
One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of hands from those who could use the word "beautiful" in the same sentence twice.
First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, "My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it."
"Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher. She then called on little Michael.
"My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully."
She said, "Excellent, Michael!"
Then the teacher reluctantly called on Tony.
"Last night at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said 'Beautiful, just f#*king beautiful!' "
A girl came skipping home from school one day.
"Mummy, Mummy," she yelled "we were counting today and all the other kids could only count to 4, but I counted to 10.
1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10! See?
Very good, said her Mother.
Is it because I'm blonde?
"Yes, it's because you're blonde," said the Mummy.
.
.
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The next day the girl came skipping home from school.
"Mummy, Mummy," she yelled, "we were saying the alphabet today, all the other kids could only say it to D, but I said it to G.
A,B,C,D,E,F,G! See?
"Very good," said her Mother.
Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?
"Yes it's because you're blonde!
.
.
.
The following day the girl came skipping home from school.
"Mummy, Mummy," she yelled, "we were in Gym class today and when we showered all the other girls had flat chests, but I have these!"
She lifted her tank top to reveal a pair of 36C's.
"Very good," said her embarrassed mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?"
"No Honey, it's because you're 24."
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What do you call a teacher who doesn't fart in public?
A: A private tooter!
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Q: What did Bruce Lee catch?
The kung flu!
Q: What dog loves to take baths?
A: A shampoo-dle!
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I liked the husband wife and the dog joke
too funny
Though the thread is goin off-topic from SMS to jokes
Nevermind
keep updatin
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YA guttu I thought of creating sms jokes
But I got some other jokes
I didnt ant to create another topic.
Thats it :D
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The guy loved the girl of his dreams... He handed her 12 roses, 11 real and 1 fake and said "I will love you till the last one dies..."
Whats the Similarity Betwn Walking on the Edge Of Mount Everest and Fucking a 65 Year Old Woman??ANS: Whatever happens... Don't Look Down!
A 20yr old girl toTattoo artist How much wll u charge for drawing an animal on my knee? Artist : Rs.300 for Tiger, Rabit or Lion BUT "Girrafe"is free.
Sardar 2 his Wife: My frend told me dat he has fuckd every woman in our buildng excpt one." Wife:"It must be Poonam on 4th floor. She is very traditional.!"
Naukrani: Malkin aap udaas kyon hain? Malkin: Tumhare sahab apne office ki kisi ladki se pyaar karte hai. Naukrani: Nahin, sahab mujhe dhokha nahin de sakte
After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, “You know, I was a fool when I married you.” The husband replied, “Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice.”
If ever in your life you R very sad & lonely & feel that you have lost every thing, I will come, Hold your hand, take you 4 Walk on a Bridge & Show you where 2 jump From
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Hey Dear Freind tuluvaguy ... you are bringing so much laughter to our life. Your jokes are really touching and relax us a lot.
Thanks boss...
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Sardar apni 21 saal ki beti ki SHADI k liye 24 saal ka LADKA dekne DELHI gaya. Vahan se BIWI ko phone kiya-24 ka koi LADKA na mila 12-12 k 2 LADKE CHALENGE ?
What is the similarity between suicide & masturbation? khudkushi & khud-khushi!...
MALLIKA ne jab chirag ko gisa,to usme se BHOOT nikala aur bola "kya hukum?" MALLIKA:"Meri PYAAS bhuja do." BHOOT says"7up se...ya 7inch se..
Sardr in mysore palace, Tourist guide-sir please dont sit there,it is Tipu sultan's chair.Sardar- oye dont wory i'll get up when He Comes
In a battle field sardarji was wearing a mosquito net to his body instead bullet proff jacket . His friend asked why are you wearing mosquito net . Sardarji replied when mosquito cant enter through net . HOW CAN BULLET CAN ENTER BODY
1st Voter to 2nd Voter:"Kisko diya? 2nd Voter:"Sonia,magar is baar mazaa nahi aaya. Pichli baar Dalne diya tha, is baar sirf dabaane diya!!!
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