-
ok.. that was the last of the children joke... next will come some sarcastic & criticizing couple joke... hope you will like it.
-
-
2 - PASSION / HUSBAND-WIFE ARGUMENTS
HE: I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours!
SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon .I've been looking for a face like yours!!!
HE: Hi!didn't we go on a date once? or was it twice?
SHE: Must've been once.I never make the same mistake twice!!!
HE: May I have the pleasure of this dance?
SHE: No,I'd like to have some pleasure too!!!
HE: How did you get to be so beautiful?
SHE: I must've been given your share!!!
HE: Is it hot in here or is it just you?
SHE: It's hot!!!
HE: Will you come out with me this Saturday?
SHE: Sorry! I'm having a headache this weekend!!!
HE: Your face must turn a few heads!
SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs!
HE: Go on ,don't be shy.Ask me out!
SHE: Okay,get out!!!
HE: I think I could make you very happy
SHE: Why,are you leaving?
HE: What would you say if I asked u to marry me?
SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time!!
-
HE: Can I have your name?
SHE: why,don't you already have one?
HE: Shall we go and see a film?
SHE: I've already seen it!!!
HE: Do you think it was fate which brought us together?
SHE: Nah,it was plain bad luck!!!
HE: You know I can't seem to get your face out of my mind.
SHE: Wow really, I have a similar problem I cant seem to get you out of my face!!!
HE: When I look at your face, I can't hold my self down..
SHE: And when I look at your face I can't seem to keep my food down!
HE: You know when they made u they must have broken the mold.
SHE: Yeah and when they were making you must have leaked out of your mold!!
HE: Roses are red, Violets are blue, could there be anyone as beautiful as you?
SHE: Roses are red, Violets are blue, i'm sure there's no-one as ugly as you!
HE: Do you have a phone number I can reach you on?
She: Sorry, telephones are against my religion!!!
HE: "Haven't we met before?"
SHE: "Perhaps. I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."
HE: "Haven't I seen u someplace before?
SHE: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."
-
HE: "Your body is like a temple."
SHE: "Sorry, there r no services today."
HE: "I'd go through anythg 4 u."
SHE: "Good! Let's start w/ ur bank account."
HE: "I would go to the end of the world 4 u.
SHE: "Yes, but would u stay there?
HE: May I hold ur hand?
SHE: No thanks, it isn't heavy.
HE: Say u love me! Say u love me!
SHE: u love me...
SHE: If we become engaged will u give me a ring??
HE: Sure, what's ur phone number??
SHE: I think the poorest people are the happiest.
HE: Then marry me & we'll be the happiest couple
SHE: Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
HE: Don't u ever want to improve??
HE: I love u & I could die for u!
SHE: How soon??
SHARON: Have u ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss??
TRACY: I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his mouth.
-
Hey u r here tooo
I was blind not to s ur thread here
I loved the childrens jokes
they are too gud
will forward to many
-
LOL.. i really like the idea of u reading all my stuff ;) i really like answering & replying to all my readers:D i am happy that i could make ur day... i hope many ppl will be reading my jokes & that they can come & comment here too... and we will have fun sharing more jokes:D... the more popular i get the better will my jokes be:D
-
HE: u remind me of the sea.
SHE: Because I'm wild, romantic & exciting?
HE: NO, because u make me sick.
WIFE: u tell a man something, it goes in one ear & comes out of the other.
HUSBAND: u tell a woman something: It goes in both ears & comes out of the mouth.
MARY: John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly.What do u think, Peter?
PETER: A bit of both. I think u're pretty ugly.
Woman: "...And are u sure u love me & no one else ?"
Man: " Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday".
GIRL: "One kiss & I'll be urs forever."
BOY 'thanks for the warning'
A Husband Was Asked: "Do u talk to ur wife after sex?"
He replied: "Depends, if I Can find a Phone"
Man on wedding night-"Are u sure I'm the first man u are sleeping with?
WIFE :”Of course honey, I stayed awake with all the others!'
WIFE: "what do u like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?
Husband: after looking at her from head to toe) "I like ur sense of humor"
Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Darling : When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Darling : Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem Can there be greater than this one?
- Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden.
Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, But I don't have any worries or troubles.
Girl: Well that is because we aren't married yet.
-
Most of the jokes are already posted somewhere in this forum
I've read them but cant remeber the thread
Nice try but
-
- Son: Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.
Mom: Well, you have done the right thing.
Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.
MAN: "Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?
WOMAN: Honey, I'd have married you NO MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE"
FATHER: "let me see your report card."
Son: "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."
Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire?"
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."
Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman. What were you before you married her?"
Millionaire: "A Billionaire"
Posting Permissions
- You may not post new threads
- You may not post replies
- You may not post attachments
- You may not edit your posts
-
Forum Rules
Senior Member
BizHat User
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks