SMS Jokes -More Updates

**tuluvaguy** · 05-11-2006, 03:11 PM

How2kill a mosquito:catch it alive,put it in bed upside down,tie its legs by thread and confirm that it will not move.then do kichu kichu in its stomach.Then d mosquito wil laugh by opening its mouth,catch its mouth n if u pour a table spoon of poison d mosquito wil die

2 sardars robbed d bank S1:we have to count d money now..To divide among our selves...! S2:tension kyu lethe mamu kal news paper me atha na...

Sardar: Shirt Ke Liye Badhiya Kapda Dikhana? SaLeSMan: PLAIN Main Dikhau? Sardar: Hawaai Jahaaj Tak Jane Ki Kya Jarurat Hai? Yahi Dikha Dona!

Samunder kinare baithe ho,kbhi to leher aegi,Samunder kinare baithe ho,kabi to leher aegi,chupke se usme susu KAR DENA,kisiko SMELL nai aaegi

Sardar's Wife: pls don't drive the bike fast. i'm very Frightened. Sardar: if u feel Fear, u Better close ur EYES, LIKE ME..!

A girl went 2 doctor & said-my BoyFrind is a BASTARD. Dr asked-why? She says-he kissed me. Dr kisses & asks-like this? So wat? She says-he threw my clothes. Dr-like this? So wat? She says-he had sex with me. Dr-like this? So wat? She says-then he told me that he has AIDS! Dr says-"BASTARD"...

girl askd a plastic surgen 2 make another hole near her ass. Surgen ws surprisd & askd, why? Girl :"Business is gud,so,opening a new branch.

Man: Oye tera ek daant neela kaise ho gaya? Sardar: Yaar mein ink lagayi hai. Man: Woh kyon? Sardar: Kyon ki aaj kal BLUE TOOTH ka jamana hai yaar.

Teacher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller? Pappu: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl.

Sardar:Raat muje ek aadmi ne chaku dikhakar loot liya. Friend:Lekin tere pas to hamesha Gun hoti hai. Sardar-Wo maine chupa di thi, varna wo bhi chori ho jati.

Theater me naripradhan film chal rahi thi. Ek Ladki khadi ho kar josh me boli: aaj ki nari kya nahi kar sakti? Ek sardar khada ho kar bola, DEEWAR PE SUSU.....

Sardar ko uska sasur maar raha tha Y? bcoz,his wif deliverd a baby & doctor msgd him"mubarak ho ap baap bangaye"- & he forwarded da same 2 all his freinds .

**tuluvaguy** · 05-11-2006, 03:20 PM

Santa & Banta were walking in the highlands then suddenly Santa fell down a deep hole.
Banta: Are you ok?
Santa: Fine thanks!
Banta: Did you break anything?
Santa: No, there's nothing down here!

**Guttu** · 05-11-2006, 03:56 PM

Toooooo good man!!!

More updates needed

**tuluvaguy** · 05-12-2006, 12:26 PM

Chinto gets 0 marks in paper.Father asks him wat is it.Chinto replies:Teacher ke paas STAR khatam ho gaye to PLANET dene shuru kar diye

**tuluvaguy** · 05-21-2006, 10:27 AM

train me sardar k saamne wale seat me 3 gujju ladkia baiti thi.... usne unka naam poocha tho pehli wali :"mein seeta behen" doosriwali:"mein sujatha behen" theesriwali:" mein geeta behen" unhone sardarse se uska naam poochatho wo bola " mein santa behenchod"

Ek bar ek couple train mein ja raha tha, TO UNKI VARTALAP SUNIYE HUSBAND: MERI JAAN MAIN TUMHE DIL SE PYAR KARTA HUN, MAIN TUMAHRE JISM SE NAHI AATMA SE PYAR KARTA HUN, MAIN TUMHE ITNA PYAR KARTA HUN KI MAIN TUMARA JISM KUTTON TO DAAL DU. to unki sath vali seat par banta betha tha, to vo bola "BHAU BHAU BAHU" !!!!!!!!

1 Sawal : Duniya ka sabse mushkil kaam kya hai ? Jawaab : Soye huye penis par condom chadaana !

Bhikari-"sahab ek rupiya de do". Sahab-"tumhe sharam nahi aati road par khade hokar bhikh mangte". Bhikari-"abe tere ek rupiye ke liye kya office khol lu"

A Sardar proposes a girl :- Darling kya tum mujhse ... Then da girl slaps him & says Tameez se baat karo. Srdr :- Behanji kya aap mujhse Shaadi karogi ?

**tuluvaguy** · 05-23-2006, 08:46 AM

About a century or two ago, the Pope decided that all the Sardars had to leave Italy. Naturally there was a big uproar from the Sardar community.

So the Pope made a deal. He would have a religious debate with a member of the Sardar community. If the Sardar won, the Sardars could stay. If the Pope won, the Sardars would leave.

The Sardars realized that they had no choice. So they picked a middle aged man named Santa Singh to represent them. Santa Singh asked for one condition to be added to the debate. To make it more interesting, the debate was to be conducted using sign language and neither side would be allowed to talk. The Pope agreed.

The day of the great debate came. Santa Singh and the Pope sat opposite each other for a full minute before the Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers. Santa Singh looked back at him and raised one finger.

The Pope waved his fingers in a circle around his head. Santa Singh pointed to the ground where he sat. The Pope pulled out a wafer and a glass of wine. Santa Singh pulled out an apple.

The Pope stood up and said, "I give up. This man is too good. The Sardars can stay. " An hour later, the cardinals were all around the Pope asking him what had happened. The Pope said, "First I held up three fingers to represent the trinity. He responded by holding up one finger to remind me that there was still one God common to both our religions. Then I waved my finger around me to show him that God was all around us. He responded by pointing to the ground and showing that God was also right here with us. I pulled out the wine and wafer to show that God absolves us from our sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of original sin. He had an answer for everything. What could I do?"

Meanwhile, the Sardar community had crowded around Santa Singh. "What happened ?" they asked. "Well", said Santa Singh, "First he said to me that the Sardars had three days to get out of here. I told him that not one of us was leaving. Then he told me that this whole city would be cleared of Sardars. I let him know that we were staying right here." "And then?", asked the crowd. "I don't know," said Santa Singh, "He took out his lunch and I took out mine".