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Thread: some jokes

  1. #21
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    5

    Default LoL!!

    LoL mann ur killing me!

  2. #22
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    IL
    Posts
    44

    Default

    A woman approach to an old man sitting by the porch
    And says: "I notice you are very joyful man, what is your secret to a long lasting and happy life?"
    "I smoke 3 packs of cigarettes a day" says the old man.
    "Drinks 6 packs of beer, eats greasy food, and never exercise!!!"
    "It's amazing" says the woman.
    "How old are you?"
    "The old man applied: "I'm 26 years old…"

  3. #23
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    IL
    Posts
    44

    Default

    What is the biggest fear of using an electric sheet?
    Wet dream.
    ****************************************** :!:
    A blond girl is written a letter to her friend:
    "What's up sister?! Listen. I'm written to u 'cause I haven't seen you for a long time and I'm missing you a lot. If you are not getting this letter please inform me so I will send u another one… I'm written slowly 'cause I know that u can't read fast.
    I would like to send you some money in this letter, but unfortunately I already closed the envelop…"
    :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

  4. #24
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    IL
    Posts
    44

    Default

    three more:

    At a literature class the teacher asked the students to write a short story that will contain religious, sex and mystery.
    One of the students wrote: "oh my god… I'm pregnant... But from Whom?
    ************************************************ :!:
    A blond girl wants to fly to turkey.
    She is calling to the airport and asking: "how long the flight takes?"
    The clerk said" just a minute…"
    "Thank you very much" said the blond girl, and hang up.
    ************************************************ :!:
    Women pass the road on a red light.
    Policeman has stopped her.
    Mam can I see your license?"
    The woman: "I would have show u but my license is on dismissal for 15 year"
    Policeman: "can I see insurance and car license?"
    Woman: "I would have show u but the car is stolen. The car owner oppose a little bit so I murdered him and put the body in the trunk"
    The stunned officer calls for back up.
    The chief policeman came and goes to the woman and asked her to show him her car's trunk.
    She showed him, he see no body.
    He asked to see her license and she showed him.
    He asked to see the car insurance and license and she showed them.
    The stunned chief asked her: "how can it be? The policeman said you don't have your license nor the car license and insurance and that you have body in your trunk"
    "Sure" said the woman. The next thing he is going to said is that I drive in red light."
    :D :D :D :D

  5. #25
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    India
    Posts
    15

    Default A Very Good Joke

    Santa was writing the passive voice of "I made a mistake." He wrote, " I was made by a mistake".

  6. #26
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    5

    Default Blonde!

    A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.

    The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.

    The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.

    Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.

    Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.

    To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.

    The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"

    The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"

  7. #27
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    5

    Default

    nice funny
    ISRAEL FTW!
    מי פה ישראלי???
    :)

  8. #28
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    5

    Default

    Two friends:
    - What is it: it weighs 500 pounds, it provides heat during the winter but hangs on the tree during the summer?
    - ???
    - It is a stove.
    - A stove that hangs on a tree?
    - Why does it matter to you where I keep my stove during the summer.

  9. #29
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    5

    Default

    Two Scots, a father and his son, go to America.
    - Daddy, when we’ll arrive?
    - Shut up and swim.

  10. #30
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    52

    Default

    haha nice joke XD
    and i'm from israel too
    MA KORE AHI SHELI
    lol really nice joke

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