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Thread: Animal Jokes....... {CLEAN}

  1. #21
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    hey kyleshome, do you have any personal problem in me posting 3 jokes per post???? These are valid posts and thank heavens for me not posting 1 per post..

    You cant interrupt me..

    Centipede Jokes

    Why was the centipede late?
    Because he was playing "This little Piggy" with his baby brother!

    What do you get if you cross a centipede and a parrot?
    A walkie talkie!

    What is worse than a giraffe with a sore throat?
    A centipede with chilblains!

  2. #22
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    What has 50 legs but cant walk?
    Half a centipede!

    What do you call a guard with 100 legs?
    A sentrypede!

    What do you get if you cross a centipede and a chicken?
    Enough drumsticks to feed an army!

  3. #23
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    What did one centipede say to the other centipede?
    You've got a lovely pair of legs, You've got a lovely pair of legs,You've got a lovely pair of legs,You've got a lovely pair of legs,You've got a lovely pair of legs,You've got a lovely pair of legs ....!

    Why was the centipede dropped from the insect football team?
    He took too long to put his boots on!

    What is worse than an alligator with toothache?
    A centipede with athlete's foot!

  4. #24
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    Chicken jokes

    Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
    A: Because chickens hadn't evolved yet


    Q: Why did the turtle cross the road?
    A: To get to the shell station


    Q: Why did the chewing gum cross the road?
    A: Because it was stuck to the chicken!

  5. #25
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    Q: Why did the horse cross the road?
    A: Because the chicken needed a day off

    Q: Why did the cow cross the road?
    A: To get to the udder side!

    Q: Why did the chicken end up in the soup?
    A: Because it ran out of cluck!

  6. #26
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    Q: What happened when the chicken ate cement?
    A: She laid a sidewalk!

    Q: What did the chicken do when he saw a bucket of fried chicken?
    A: She kicked the bucket!

    Q: What do you call a crazy chicken?
    A: A cuckoo cluck!

  7. #27
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    Q: What happened to the chicken whose feathers were all pointing the wrong way?
    A: She was tickled to death!

    Q: Why don't chickens like people?
    A: They beat eggs!

    Q: Why did the rooster run away?
    A: He was chicken!

  8. #28
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    Q: What do chickens grow on?
    A: Eggplants!

    Q: Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?
    A: He heard the referee calling fowls

    Q: Why is it easy for chicks to talk?
    A: Because talk is cheep!

    Q: What do you get when you cross a chicken with a duck?
    A: A bird that lays down!

  9. #29
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    Q: What happens when a hen eats gunpowder?
    A: She lays hand gren-eggs!

    Q: Why did the chicken cross the "net"?
    A: It wanted to get to the other site!

    Q: What do you call a rooster who wakes you up at the same time every morning?
    A: An alarm cluck!

  10. #30
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    Q: Why did the chicken cross the road half way?
    A: He wanted to lay it on the line!

    Q: What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon?
    A: They go on peck-nics!

    Q: What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
    A: Coop-cakes!

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