How should we motivate ourselves in negative circumstances?

[Kakashi]

Dear Neeraj-san, a question for you:
What if you always listen to others, while the others never listen to you?

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

Dear Neeraj-san, a question for you:
What if you always listen to others, while the others never listen to you?

Hello dear friend Kakashi-san,

Its my immense pleasure to know that you want my point of view on certain aspects. I feel happy to share my views based on my life experiences.

Its a natural habit of a person that we expect the same what we do to others. If we tell truth to someone, we expect others not to lie to us. If we do take care of others, we expect the care in return. Similarly, if we take pain for others, or pay attention at something what others say, we expect the enough enthusiasm, need and patience in others as well to listen to you.

Now, I see listening to others and others listening to us as a two different phenomenon. Why? and How come? Because, when we do anything in our life - it is because - it brings happiness to us. Even sometimes taking pain for others gives us lots of pleasure. So, the thing that matters most is - how we think and what brings happiness in our life. Our action follows it. We have control over our actions and activities but we can't control other's. Or I should rather ask, should we try to have control over other's wish or their actions? I find it easy to answer. No.

We should not expect the same in return. They may find it easy to return in different ways as it brings happiness to them. Just another way to look at it. The other person may not be so much sensitive as we are that he or she understands our feelings until we say it explicitly. So, if needed, let us be explicit. Or, else just keep doing ONLY those things that keeps us happy. But do not start to hate that person because he is not behaving in a way same as expected by us.

So, let us make a habit to listen to others in a way that it brings happiness to our lives and we are honest enough in this act that we don't expect anything in return. -- It automatically happens. It may not come from one person, then it would come from some other one.

[Kakashi]

Well.. Maybe we don't do it for our own happiness but for the others - which brings us to the previous topic: Whether we should sacrifice our own happiness for someone else's.

And maybe we do it for the others but still expect them to listen back, and when they don't it hurts a little. And disappoints us again.

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

Yes Dear.... What I can say, that there bound to be some disappointment because at the end, we all are human because we have feelings. But the key point that I always wanted to stress is that we should be capable enough to come out of this odd situations as soon as possible. Because ... If one door of happiness gets closed, other gets opened and we should not waste our time staring at the old gate for long.

[Kakashi]

Dear Neeraj-san,
But what happens if another dooor is NOT opened?

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

Sorry for the delay in my response dear Kakashi-san. Actually, I was out of station and could not check the mails.

Well, I need some more time to reply to your doubt. I just don't want to kill the momentum. You may go ahead dear.

Thanks

[Kakashi]

It's allright, Neeraj-san. I was out of town as well last week, so I guess we're even.
I'll be eagerly waiting for your reply.

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

Dear Kakashi-san,

Let me share with you one of the African Probverb.

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Every morning in Africa, a gazelle awakens. He has only one thought on his mind: To be able to run faster than the fastest lion. If he cannot, then he will be eaten.

Every morning in Africa a lion awakens. He has only one thought on his mind: To be able to run faster than the slowest gazelle. If he cannot, he will die of hunger.

Whether you choose to be a gazelle or a lion is of no consequence. It is enough to know that with the rising of the sun, you must run. And you must run faster than you did yesterday or you will die.

This is the race of life.
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When you ask me - "What happens if the other door of happiness doesn't open when one closes?"

I start corelating it with HOPE. When we wake up in the morning, we should have hope for something good happening with us. Once we lose hope, we die.

In the above story, both the gazelle and the lion have hope that they are going to survive in this race of life. This is the hope that fills them with energy.

Just to sum up - There is a life before we die. Don't tell me, what life is, cause I don't really wanna know. Don't tell me how this game ends, we'll just see how it goes... '

[Kakashi]

I see your point of view and understand it. You count in hope. You hope that things will work out well everyday, without being certain; you have faith in life and I respect that.
But, the truth is that life is bittersweet - more bitter than sweet, actually - and hope alone is not always enough. We can still hope, but if our hopes/ dreams never come true, then it is only logical that we stop dreaming/ hoping. And that's were the cynical part of our life begins.
I'm not saying that I'm happy about that. I would like to hope and dream as well, but I know that what I hope for, what I dream for, is just not going to happen.
So I give up. I gave up some time ago. And I think that (unfortunately) many people have given up as well.

Just my humble thoughts.

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

Thanks for showing respect towards my thoughts dear Kakashi-san. You would be surprised to know that I feel so much motivated by reading the quote in your signature "Die. It's the last thing I'll do. ". It is so true and quite near in meaning when I say - "Don't tell me, what life is, cause I don't really wanna know. Don't tell me how this game ends, we'll just see how it goes.

We have so much similarity in a way we think, even at this topic we differ due to our different experiences in our life. This is what I can think at this point in time. Let me share with you one of the philosophy from one of the religious book called "Gita" It contains Lord Krishna's preachings on 'Karma'- This has influenced many. Hope its sayings would help you as well.

One of the most important saying is - In this world, we have come for some purpose. We should only concentrate over doing all the good things in life without caring for the results.

Hope I am not confusing you :-D