(A+) t o d a y 's j o k e

[rimcs]

Well friends if you are intrested in
more jokes click on the link
http://forums.bizhat.com/viewtopic.php?t=23211

Hope you will enjoy(thanks neeraj)
Amitabh

[indianbaba]

Thanks for the joke neeraj. nice one.

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

Thanks once again indianbaba for encouraging all the posters. You are simply great boss. Keep up your good work :-)

Here comes one more....

.................................................. .................................................. ......
Two old ladies are outside their nursing home, having a drink and a smoke, when it starts to rain. One of the old ladies pulls out a condom, cuts off the end, puts it over her cigarette, and continues smoking.

Maude: What in the hell is that?

Mabel: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.

Maude: Where did you get it?

Mabel: You can get them at any drugstore.

The next day, Maude hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms.

The pharmacist, obviously embarrassed, looks at her kind of strangely (she is after all, over 80 years of age), but very delicately asks what brand of condom she prefers.

"Doesn't matter Sonny, as long as it fits on a Camel."

The pharmacist fainted.

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

Mike wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees are a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and ironed. Mike looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So's the rest of the house.

He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table, reading "Honey, breakfast is on the stove. I left early to go shopping. Love you!" He goes to the kitchen and sure enough, there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating.

Mike asks, "Son, what happened last night?"

His son says, "Well, you came home after 3 a.m., drunk and delirious. Broke some furniture, threw up in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door."

Confused, Marty asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"

His son replies, "Oh, that! Mum dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you yelled "Leave me alone woman, I'm a married man"

[indianbaba]

Thanks for the jokes.
Keep posting.

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

Thanks once again indianbaba for your continue interest in this thread that ecourages many to post the best.

An elderly man owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back, fixed up nice; picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees. The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming.

One evening the old man decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't beenthere for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny dipping in his pond.

He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.

One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!"

The old man frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the pond naked." Holding the bucket up he said, "I'm here to feed the alligator."

[indianbaba]

That was a repost i suppose. Posted in bb.bizhat.com
Anyway keep sharing.

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

Dick Cheney and George W. Bush were having breakfast at the White House.

The attractive waitress asks Cheney what he would like, and he eplies, "I'd like a bowl of oatmeal and some fruit."

"And what can I get for you, Mr. President?"

George W. replies with his trademark wink and slight grin, "How about a quickie this morning?"

"Why, Mr. President!" the waitress exclaims "How rude! You're starting to
act like Mr. Clinton, and you've only been in your second term of office for a year! ''

As the waitress storms away, Cheney leans over to Bush and whispers...

"George....It's pronounced 'quiche'."

[Guttu]

yeah alligator is a repost
the president is new to me

Continue the thread
its goin gr8

[http://neerajsingh.bizhat]

A Greek and an Italian met one sunny afternoon in Greece and shared a glass of wine. The Greek couldn't help bragging about his rich cultural heritage.

"We Greeks built the Parthenon," he said proudly.

The Italian answered, "We Italians built the Colliseum and the Sistine Chapel."

The Greek, unfazed, said, "We Greeks gave the world Socrates and Plato."

The Italian said, "We Italians gave the world Michaelangelo, DaVinci and Gallileo."

Somewhat frustrated, the Greek said, "Yes, but we Greeks gave the world sex."

To which the Italian calmly replied, "True, but we Italians introduced it to women!"